Free on Craigslist!! NOT HORSE RELATED! but funny

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Free on Craigslist!! NOT HORSE RELATED! but funny

Postby busted on Thu Jun 19, 2008 4:11 pm

I was looking on the free section on craigslist and found the funniest add ever!!! I would go get it just because the add made me laugh so hard I almost pee'd my pants! :lol: :lol: :lol:

Ferocious Attack Couch

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Date: 2008-06-18, 11:39PM PDT

Ferocious attack couch is available for adoption to any home willing to accept it.

This destructive couch has been trained as a proud warrior and will fiercely defend your house, even against you. Well-trained since 10-weeks of age to attack anything in its presence, it will protect your family from evil things, including the following:

* insects

* other trained attack couch

* babies

* toilet paper

* anything under a blanket

* unwanted house guests

* wanted house guests

* paper bags

* floor rugs

* Chuck Norris

* Feet.

Great with children (assuming you don’t like the children). Probably best used for professional couch fighting. It is housebroken, but only because it wants to be. This attack couch has trained itself to seek out its food anywhere you hide it and rip the bag open to feed itself, great for those who travel extensively. Also trained to drink water out of toilet bowls and dishwater from items in the sink. Knows how to open some doors. It will find you wherever you hide.

Neutered (trust me, you wont want to it to procreate). Has not been declawed, but you'll figure that out really fast.

Understands and responds to a variety of vulgar and profane verbal commands. Has a very soft and furry cushion, like a teddy bear - however it will bite your face if you try to touch it.

Willing to accept trades. Potential adopters must have experience with trained attack-couches... please be prepared to show scars.

For the love of God, someone please take this thing out of my house.
Rachel Dekker formaly Jardine
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